Saturday, April 07, 2007


An envelope came to my mailbox that I had sent to someone else. As I suspected, the letter I wrote to a long lost high school classmate (detailed here and here) never reached her. It took more than a month to come back. I wonder how many places it went before someone slapped the big yellow sticker on it directing its return to me.

For fun I do another zabasearch on her name and this time the results include a different last name for her and a more recent address. I'm surprised. Not that she's apparently married; it would have surprised me more had she never wed. I'm surprised that the zabasearch made the connection between her maiden and married names after failing to do it when I tried only a month or so earlier.

I'm also relieved. I didn't picture her as a perpetual bachelorette. I don't picture most women staying single forever. And if she had stayed solo, part of me wondered what had gone wrong. I know half of marriages end in divorce so it's not crazy to think that some people decide to skip the aggravations of acrimony and alimony not to mention the legal fees and simply stay single. But we were made to mate even if we aren't good at staying mates.

Now I decide whether it's worth another try. I know I have the correct address now because I poke around some more to confirm it. But do I take the letter out of the returned envelope, put it in a new one and send it off again to some uncertain fate?


A Girl From Texas said...

I would investigate and make sure she isn't married before you send the letter. If you know she has a married name there is a chance she could be married. If she is married then you might come across as a home wrecker.

You said: "But we were made to mate even if we aren't good at staying mates". I have often said Marriage is the exception, not the rule.

John said...

The home wrecking perception might me a problem if I lived close enough for us to date. We live about 1,000 miles apart. Carrying on an affair from that distance would be highly improbable, even if we desired it.

However I recognize the possibility that her husband, if there still is one, will see things as you do and the letter, which I sent off this morning, will get to her house but never to her.